I got dumped…by my tennis coach
About four months ago, I woke up around 10am with neck pain, as a precaution I took half a Valium hoping it would prevent a full on cervicogenic migraine. My training sessions are usually at 1:30pm, I don’t always pass out after 2.5mg of Valium, but a lack of sleep can make it happen. Lo and behold I passed out on this day and woke up to realise it was 1.27pm!!! I quickly messaged my coach to let him know what happened. Usually he would reply with ‘rest up and see you next session’, or ‘that’s a shame, get better!’ On this day… he kept typing and stopping for a good few minutes until he finally sent me a rather anal response along the lines of? ‘Letting me know three minutes before isn’t great’. But he said it in French and in French it was more impactful!
I was already feeling like shit, in pain, on Valium, unable to go to tennis which I’ve loved since I’m four years old, his message made everything ten times worse! To put things into context, I’ve never once disputed a late cancellation fee, I’ve paid for every single late cancellation in eight years, I’ve given many birthday and Christmas presents, invited him to birthdays, the house for the Monaco GP race, ‘The Cupid Index’ book launch in 2021, hell I even got him VIP tickets to go to an Everton football match with his nephew. Have I missed something? Oh yes, the SHEEVA London men’s jewellery for his birthdays, I gifted him an Everton skull Bracelet on black onyx a few years ago, and a men’s rose bracelet on whit jade about six years ago.
1878 Skull with Diamonds on Black Onyx
The Bracelet I gifted to the ‘Coach’ who dumped me…
I replied to explain what happened, and he scolded me! He had the audacity to say that my late cancellations despite my ongoing health issues were ‘chiant’, a pain in the ass, and that perhaps it would be better to resume once I’m feeling better, because as it stands it’s not fun for either of us.
For a second or two I was in shock, what was the issue, I wasn’t a professional tennis player missing a session before a Grand Slam! He gets paid either way… I didn’t leave him waiting on court without informing him, I notified him the moment I realised what happened! He’s cancelled on me sometimes last minute, (not nearly as many times as I have but still…), I never got reimbursed for those missed hours, things happen, it’s life. He also knew about my many challenges.
I just crawled back under the covers.
Later that day I messaged my London coach who’s been coaching me since 2007! I must have cancelled on him hundreds of times over the years due to last minute migraines, insomnia, injuries etc. He never once had a go at me, he always says, ‘ah that’s a shame,’ or, ‘I was looking forward to seeing you, don’t worry’, sometimes he’d even go further by asking me if I needed anything. My Monaco coach is now living next to the club, my London coach has to drive an hour to the club. Sometimes he’s driven the entire way for me to message last minute, and he’s still been so nice to me. When I told him what happened he was horrified! His exact words were, ‘No way! That’s not good, what’s his problem?’ We chatted for a bit as I was feeling extremely down, he told me to try and not be too upset about it and that it wasn’t my fault. ‘As long as you pay him then I don't get his problem, He can just go have a break and a coffee, no big deal!’ He went on to say that it’s a bad attitude and tried cheering me up as he knew just how much it frustrates me missing out on things.
The Queen’s Cub London, summer 2022 (Pre Long Covid)
Grass Courts!
As for the one who dumped me, he messaged me once to ask for his payment of a few thousand euros, might I add I made it to 1% of those training sessions. And another time to thank me for his Xmas hamper, (which was too late to cancel), and so I just sent a peace emoji as I couldn’t be assed to engage in minor chit chat As my psychologist said, he has officially broken the emotional trust with his inconsiderate and somewhat rude messages.
I haven’t heard from him since, nor do I expect to, those last messages revealed his true colours, an apathetic ungrateful sod! I haven’t picked up a tennis racket since then, or since my last training in London, it’s been five months now and I have yet to rip the band aid off. Every person I talked to about this reacted the same way, so I know I’m not overreacting, but some things are unforgivable, how he behaved with me is inexcusable. I was never rude, disrespectful, or dismissive, I always treated him with respect and kindness, this was undeserved. This had taken a real beating to my already very low self-confidence, it had put me off wanting to get another coach. I lost a trainer during Covid as he got fed up with the strict family protocols to ensure health and safety, then another prior to that (long story), and now this.
Who knows what the future holds, but for now I am in dire need of a lot of both physical and mental preparation, before getting back to something I once couldn’t live without. And no more free signed copies of ‘The Cupid Index’ or Sheeva London jewellery unless their worth has been proven to me over time like my London tennis coach. Or they’re a super famous book agent etc. I already have trust issues as it stands, being kind hasn’t worked out too well for me over the years, and whoever came up with ‘No regrets’, what were they thinking? I regret so many things in life and wish that I could go back and undo all those bad decisions, including gifting unappreciative assholes Sheeva London Jewellery and The Cupid Index books. There have been one too many, I’ll leave some of those stories for future blogs. Next time someone wants something from me, unless they’re a close friend/family member or absolute saint, they can go on the website and shop online!